Smoke Before the Fire

I realized today that because of my malleability people have always put me in the place they've wanted me to be, for my whole life. Whatever position they need me to be in, that's what I fall into. And I am frustrated with myself for not doing anything about it.
I like the ability to be flexible. But not malleable.Why can't people just let me be who I am.

I take a bit longer to do things than other people, yes. But there are some things that I can do a hell of a lot faster than anyone else I know. Just let me be who I am please, and stop trying to make me into who you  are because you think that's the right way to be. I do things in my own time. I don't suck up to people. I know how I work. Work WITH me please.

I am SOOOO tired of being pushed and pulled and scolded and all the expectations that go against everything I am.

I am SICK of people giving Christians crap for trying to throw their beliefs at other people. NOT ALL OF US DO THIS!!!! This is an instance where you want to hate the player and not the game. Everyone that says crap about Christians doing this are doing the same thing. Let's just all leave each other alone and lead by example. I no longer believe so much that missions really involves going to places and telling anyone and everyone about Jesus. I believe that you go somewhere and live your life the best way you know how, and the people around you become part of your life and see how you live and THAT is what makes them see the truth of what you believe.

I am so tired of the world right now and how ridiculous people are (as well as myself). How can anybody help it? How can you not be tired of the world?